Confession is good for the Stomach

So this past week was CRAZEEEE- when is it not?

John's 40th was on Tuesday. Kids Church on Wednesday Night, In-laws on Thursday night, cancelled Kids Night out for Friday Night, Saturday night- all church prayer, Sunday - Sunday School, Extra Sunday Funday, then Church dinner on Sunday Night.

During all of this- Emma was sick and home from School Monday/Tuesday and Seanna went to the DR on Friday. She had an infection in her ear canal. Who knew you could get those?

So back to John. John does not ask for much. He is easy to please when it comes to the food department. He does not like red meat (another subject, another day) and eats a lot of chicken. His weakness is sweets. When we first got married the first night I cooked for us was a Tuesday Night. I made a nice dinner, was clearing off the table and he said- that was great honey- what is for dessert. I was like dessert? It's Tuesday night. My family only had dessert once a week- his nightly.

During our 11 years of marriage I realized that I had never made John a pie. #1 his Mom used to make him pies, sweets, etc and we would go over there and that would be his Mom/Son thing. #2 I don't like a lot of sweets sitting around tempting the girls. I only like choch. chip cookies and banana bread for desserts so why should any one else need them right? Wrong- I have been horribly selfish.

So on Tuesday I made John a pie. It was awesome. I don't even like pies- and I loved it. I remember my Mom making this. You have to make the crust- out of nuts, butter, sugar, and other stuff. Then there is a layer of cream cheese and powdered sugar. Then a layer of cherry pie filling with whipped cream (The kind you make by whipping the real cream- WOW). Then finish it off with some of the crust sprinkled on top.

I was amazed at what happens when you follow a recipe. It makes you look like a goddess. Really. So when he took a bite of it after his homemade lasagna on Tuesday night.... I was waiting for confetti to fly out of the ceiling, for bells, whistles and pretty much applause to roar throughout the entire house. He said- this is great honey- not what I was expecting but great. Really? What were you expecting? It was the most heavenly fluffy thing I had set in my mouth in months. He said- you know I kind of like the traditional cherry pie- with just cherry pie filling in the middle.

Later that night- after building up my nerves of steel I asked him- What is your second favorite pie? He said I like the good strawberry pie that has strawberries all over it and a jello type mix poured into it.

I knew the very one- Southern Strawberry pie. I just so happened to have the wonderful recipe in my recipe book my Mom made for me when I got married. I pulled it out on Thursday- went to the store and got the ingredients. I am VERY ALLERGIC to strawberries let me tell you so this was a huge deal for me to even TRY to make this for him. I made the shell from scratch- baked it, and let it cool. I cut the strawberries filled the pie crust and let them sit. I then mixed the sugar, water,cornstarch and strawberry jello. I washed my hands so much during that time period that my skin was about to fall off the bones (due to my allergies). I bought the wrong size jello mix. I bought the six ounce instead of the three. I thought no worries it says use half of a three oz. package I can figure it out. (You will see that I obviously couldn't)

John comes home from work and I open up the refrigerator to show him my Betty Crocker skills. Wow honey- two pies in one week? I told him- you only turn 40 once. I look at it an hour later and it still had not "set". Wow- that is strange the recipe says it should only take two hours. I told him that we would not be able to take the pie to his Sister and Brother in laws- maybe we should stop on the way to buy something. I stopped at the store bought 1/2 of a cherry pie, 1/2 of an apple, and a Birthday Cake. While this was a little much for 7 people I think my over buying was due to the fact that I had a failure of a pie in my fridge.

I got home- opened up the fridge to see the watery pie still sitting there. I was going to through it out and John caught me- don't throw it out- maybe it has to sit over night. I bounded out of my bed on Friday morning to find the watery pie waving at me as I opened the door. I took it out and killed it with my spatula. I then shoved it all into the trash disposal. The sound of ground up watery strawberry pie was music to my ears. I think I heard it laughing at me as it washed away.

When John came home after lunch he asked where the pie was. I said in the land of garbage disposal-dom. He said don't worry about it honey- that cherry pie you bought at the grocery store was incredible.

I lifted my head to heaven and about screamed. He then walked back into the kitchen gave me a huge wink and walked out.

Happy 40th John. I love you more than a strawberry pie with sugar on top!

PS Now you understand the phrase that I blogged on Thursday don't you :)

Failure....

Failure is the Key to Success!

The Brown Beauty

Reliable, Consistent, Faithful, Remaining, Never Changing.

Do these adjectives describe you? Do they describe someone in your life?

They describe my brown Plymouth Reliant. It was a two door brown beauty. The interior sported that faux wood look. The seats were a cream, tan-ish color. It was the car that would not die. My Dad helped me pick it out. Never buy a car in the rain. There is no way to tell if the paint is worn, or if it is shiny and brilliant. The Reliant, when dry, best resembled a large paper sack. My Dad told me it would be a great car for me; it was low in mileage and would be safe. I wanted to tell him it is because all of the other cars on the road would run from it. I quickly asked how long I had to keep this car. He said- until it dies.

It never did.

Five years later I married John and it made the long trip to NC. It was pulled by the tiny U-haul. I discovered upon our late arrival in Charlotte that a hand mirror had been reflecting on the dash the whole way. It added a nice burn spot on the illustrious vinyl interior. My poor brown paper sack.

About two years after it's NC arrive the door started screeching so loud that it announced my arrival to those that were withing a 10 mile radius. My sweet brown blog. I remember the day that John said it might be time to get rid of my reliant. I wanted to leap for joy- but was afraid I would hurt her feelings. She had been so faithful. She had heard all of my rants, laughed with me upon occasion, and never told about my late night arrivals during my dating years. Yes, she had been my consistent friend. She chewed up many of my cassette tapes, even sang with me upon occasion. She always lovingly held my belongings, she toted me around town, and never complained a bit. She never talked back, she was always there for me and was willing to go with me where ever I would turn her little steering wheel.

I am so thankful that God has been that solid, reliable, steadfast friend to me. He has heard me rant, he has laughed with me, he has held my hand as I cried, and he has even not told about some late night dates. What he has done is to change my life, his consistent love has molded me. I have learned that even though our relationship might not be the flashiest, the most sought after, the latest trend- it is the true thing.

Jesus is the best thing that has ever happened to me. See there are days that I ebb and flow. There are days that I am scared out of my mind- but on days like that I go back to the well worn page in my not so shiny red Bible and read this…..

“He that dwells in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust Surely he shall deliver you ….”
Psalm 91:1-3

I hope that you have the privilege of learning the value of that consistent love. That you will allow him to shelter you today, that you will lean on the almighty and let Him lead you. As to the Brown Reliant- she was sold for 100.00 to help a single Mom. I hope she saw the beauty in her that I learned to love.

Happy Birthday Megan

My niece Megan turned 10 this week. She is such a doll. Her creative, awesome, amazing Mother made her this amazing cake. I am telling you the truth- you know it is the truth because none of my family reads my blog. I rely on the support system of all other 2 of you that read this blog.

Anyway- one day I am going to grow up and be like my sister-in-law who makes cakes like this. One year I made a lady bug cake- does that count?

Happy Birthday Megan- I love your cute little 10 year old guts!

Hay, Garage Cleaning, Shotguns, Bowling, and Five Guys

Wow

Can I add any other words in the title? I think not. That was my day today. I could also included- box, bubble wrap, and bubba but a gal only has one title area to work with.

My goal today was to not work one second on MK Ministries. When something is your obsession it kind of creeps into your life-expands and sucks every ounce of energy out of you- or so I was told by my family. So today I told them I would not do ANYTHING MK Ministries related. I failed. Shhhh I snuck upstairs twice answered email and sent someone a new prayer pal. That is OUR SECRET okay?

So John worked on the yard, broke ground, seeded it, put hay on it and then went shooting- that sounds so foreign to me.

I worked on the garage- packed 27 boxes and then had to go to Wal-Martian to get more bubble wrap, tape, and water. You know the essential supplies one needs to clean out your garage.

I found some really great things in the garage today like:

1. A note from John that he gave me 11 years ago. He was heading to work and had left me a note where to find things with a little map. It was my second day here in Indian Trail right after we got married. All of the cards, notes, love letters from John while we were dating.

2. Emma's Baby book- pictures of Emma minutes old. I have Seanna's in the house- but not Emma's. I am putting both in a special spot now.

3. Emma and Seanna's baby dedication outfits and the outfits they came home from the hospital in. So tiny.

4. My Dad's Bible that he gave me when I was 18.

5. My postcard collection and my kaleidescope collection. I have not seen either in about 5 years.

So after spending hours in the garage and not realizing it....John announced it was time to eat. We headed to Five Guys. I have never found the five guys when we have gone there. I have asked a couple of the people working there and always get the blank what are you talking about look. I have also asked them if they have a peanut free table and they don't think that is funny either. (Five Guys is a hamburger place that serves peanuts while you wait- they have a LARGE sign stating peanuts are served freely as you walk in).

We then headed to the bowling alley. Seanna and Emma have a work chart. Once they get to 170 stars (this takes about 5 weeks) they can have a family outing. Much to my chagrin they chose bowling. I used to be a decent bowler (is that a word?-bowler). Now- not so much. Tonight my high score was 107. The girls had a great time. It was Emma's first time to bowl a strike. She flung the ball backwards twice and did not hit a human with it either time- so that was a win- win as far as I was concerned.

---------------
BTW wonderful fun buy of the week? 2 pairs of flip-flops for $5.00 at Old Navy. Can you say fun, colorful AND cheap? Gotta love it.

I can't wait for flip flop season.

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Before I forget to tell you- Emma got married today. Yes - she wore beautiful flowered "twirly" dress which all brides must wear. How could I have forgotten to tell you this was on the schedule today. Larry the cucumber died in a tragic restaurant accident. She has been married to Larry the cucumber since she was 4. She met Shawn who is not a vegetable who hails from Charlotte. We all met Shawn today (he is invisible). Larry is the father of all of her American Girl dolls. She is currently sleeping with 6 dolls. She made a chart of her kids for Shawn and also has a book with all of their Birth Certificates so that he can memorize their names, last names, and birthdays. I don't know if the happy couple is registered at Target or anything- but I can find out for you all.

I'm gonna get me a gun.....

So John is turning FORTY on Tuesday. His request for his big day? A shot gun. He is now going to start shooting skeet. I don't know the first thing about cooking them either. Do you think they will taste better broiled or served with gravy? Do you have to skin them? (Okay - I know they are not "animals" okay- calm down)

Yesterday the girls and I headed to Dicks Sporting goods. Let me just tell you that me walking into Dicks Sporting goods is equal to John walking into a Starbucks- unfamiliar territory. I grabbed the first guy that I saw at the door and said I need a shotgun. He looked at me stunned and said right now? I said not right now to use- but I need to buy one. He said I will take you to the lodge. I said I don't have reservations- again my humor was lost on another powerless victom.

We head to the "lodge" where I am handed over to Bob. Bob is in his sixties and I am guessing has pure white hair under his glossy reddish dye job. He says to me- you are new to guns huh? I thought next time I come in here I need to remember to clean off the - I am a newbe- sign on my head. I said yes- this is for my husband. I read off my computer print out of what I needed. He verified the price and informed me that I had about 20 minutes of paperwork for me.

While I filled out pages regarding my boring lack of criminal background information.... I noticed that I was the only female in the area. Seanna and Emma were standing open mouthed at all of the lodge "decor". The fake deer, the mounted deer, the deer with it's tongue sticking out. Emma is now loudly proclaiming that whomever shoots deer should be shot. I call her over to shush her and told her that we would talk about it later.

Emma now has a nose bleed and I only have wet wipes with me. Let me just tell you that when you use wet wipes it makes a nose bleed look a lot worse. Seanna is worried that we should tell people she has not been shot. I told her people would figure that out.

Paperwork done- I am now trying to find bullets when I am told it is called ammunition and am pointed to the right area. I pick up protective eye wear, ear plugs, a huge plastic case, and four boxes of bullets. Bob is now calling in my paperwork to make sure I can have the gun. He follows us up to the front. I find out that Bob is in his sixties and that he used to hunt but now does not. He offers to show me around the rest of the store but I told him I was probably at my spending limit for the day. He completes my joyous journey by giving me a stern talk. I am told that my husband should be very careful, that MY NAME is on the gun and not his- that I AM RESPONSIBLE for it.

I hope none of those skeet decide to retaliate and get John. My name will be matched to the serial number of that gun.

I gave it to him Friday night so that he could take it out today- I have one happy soon to be 40 year old on my hands. Bob did well! I might have to go back and get me a matching hot pink one! (Please note poor grammar skills is on purpose read with a southern accent)

Favorite New Quote

This is from Emma's revival of watching Stuart Little over and over and over.


Read my furry pink lips- NO!

(Quote of Snowball the cat to Stuart Little)

Some times just saying no is not enough when you have a persistent 7 and 9 year old!

Where have you been?

Where have you been? Okay so I have been showing up here daily and you have not been here....

Kidding-

So where do I start?

Holly Wild Park:

Two weekends ago we went to Hollywild Park in SC. Great little zoo/park that the kids love. Highlight of the day- Seanna feeding a llama who decided with a full mouth of food to sneeze all over her. The llama wanted more food and we convinced here that it would not sneeze twice in a row. We were wrong. Llamas + full mouth of food = green slime!

North Carolina Ladies Conference:

Thursday and Friday night were awesome. Janice Sjostrand was amazing on Thursday night and Cynthia Miller ended the conference with an amazing message. It so many ways this was a healing couple of nights. It is amazing how when you don't even realize it the Lord is changing your very core.

It is amazing how the LORD deals with us in areas of our lives. We will hear the same challenge from the Lord in our own devotionals time, in our Bible reading time, from different speakers- all confirming His voice.

Lately he has been dealing with me about my response to others. In life you will always have people that like you and people that don't like you. Being the total sanquine, people person that I am- I hate it when others reject me. I obsess as to how to make relationships around me better. The Lord has been dealing with me to let it go. Once I know that I have done my best with someone that I should not worry about what others think of me. It is amazing when I think about how much time have I wasted in looking for the applause of the crowd, the affirmation of others.

We all want to be loved, accepted, and valued- but our value, our affirmation, our love needs to come from Christ. If we are looking for it in others we will run ourselves ragged seeking what they can not give us.

John is "mapped" in the Verizon system:

As many of you know John is an engineer for Alltel Corp. It was recently purchased by Verizon. He was not promised anything in this merger. At first we were told that there was not a position for him. We have been in a holding pattern since January waiting to see if he had a job and where they would place him. We found out last Friday that he has been mapped as an engineer to the south. His boss is in Southlake, TX (Dallas area). We should find out this week or next where they will need us to re-locate. We are at peace about whatever he has planned. It has been long process for sure- but we have to give ourselves 100% to his will to be at peace.

Phil and Eve Flowers Wedding:

Saturday we left the Charlotte area at 7:30 Am and headed to Jonesboro, GA for Phil Flowers wedding. The wedding was at 1:30 PM. We changed at a McDonalds right before the wedding. We looked like a bunch of gypsies getting ready in the that tiny bathroom. The highlight of the event was Emma dropping the brush and toothbrush in the public sink. I about lost it. It was bad enough that she dropped all of her clothes on the floor (gross). I could see 1000 germs jumping on her clothes, hairbrush , and toothbrush and having a party.

The wedding was beautiful. So glad to see many Friends, MKs and Missionaries. Phil is married Yahoo. We wish he and Eve the best! I know that God is going to use their lives.

The MK Website:

A lot of my time over the past three weeks has been devoted to MK Website. We have added a new feature called 10 questions 1 face, and also MK Insider. We just added our March/April E-Magazines for all publications, and continue to add weekly e-votionals for our MKs. We are in the process of adding a new resource link for Missionaries and MKs of different ages. The Lord is using MK Ministries to reach to missionaries of different backgrounds. In the past couple of weeks we have had 3 missionaries contact us needing help with their MKs. They were told about our website and want to be involved. Help us pray for creativity and wisdom. That the Lord would open up the door to minister to MKs around the world.

You:

So I have missed you all - I really am starting to get caught up and should be back on here more regular-

Have an amazing day!

Balance

Balance is a 7 letter word that is one of the hardest to obtain in our lives. I had a minister tell me before John and I married that I was about to enter into the hardest challenge of my life. I quickly said marriage? He said no- Balance.

Balance is so tricky

We should be:
Disciplined without being harsh
Firm but yet not unyielding
People with a great work ethic-but not work-aholics.
Great listeners - but there is also a time to be heard.
Playful parents- but retain the respect of our children.
Workers for the Lord but greater still worshippers.

I do know that I am not there yet but I have been working on it.

Have you ever loaded your washing machine? You know what I am talking about you have 50 items to wash and you just don't want to do another load. Your deductive reasoning runs out the door as you convince yourself it will all fit. You pray for the lid to shut. You exhale when you can hear the agitated action of your infuriated machine. The Maytag spits on you when you walk out of the laundry room. You continue your chores and suddenly think- I did not know that _________ (fill in your city) was known for it's earthquakes. No wait- it is just the spin cycle. The noise is so loud that is sounds like 20 elephants have taken roost on your Maytag- giving it the run for it's life. What is wrong? Your machine is out of balance. That is the visual of what your life looks like when you are not submitted to his daily will.

I have lived this way for years. I have no problems with working. In fact- I love to be organized, have a plan, scratch off my list, be productive and go to all day until I hit my bed at the end of the night exhausted. All of this was great until 12 years ago a husband was ushered into my life followed by two daughters. Suddenly my spin cycle was out of whack. I had to re-arrange some of the "laundry" in my life. How do I fit them into my great life plan? Some days I still don't know- but I AM getting better- I AM a work in progress.

My Mother was and is a great Mother. I talk to her daily and consider her to be one of my best friends. Even in the greatness of her mothering skills- I can't remember one time that she ever sat down and just "played" with me. She would read to me at night, would listen to my problems, be there for me if I skinned a knee- but we never played together. When I had kids I determined that I would "play" with my kids.

When I first started playing with my kids I would time it. I know confession is good for the soul. I was so awkward I felt like a duck who had suddenly grown limbs. I made myself do it. Please don't think that I did not love my kids- I do. I just did not know how to have fun with them- yet I knew that I needed to. The more I did it- the more comfortable it became. I began to look forward to having fun with them daily. Now I feel embarrassed to even think about those days.

Whatever area that you are struggling with balance in your life today- HE is the one that can help you. Some of you have been promised great things in your life from the Lord. You have not seen it come to pass. Life is a process. He is watching to see if you will be faithful in the little things and will promote you to the greater.

I heard a minister say the other day- we want to go around the world and cast out the devils out of people when we don't have the victory over the sink filled with dirty dishes.

We all have talents, abilities and callings that we were given:

Romans 12:6-8 (New International Version)

We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man's gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his[a]faith. If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; 8if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully.

All of these are great talents- but they can also be done in extreme- we have to be careful that we keep all of it in balance. We have a reponsability to keep our life in balance.

Be faithful
Be balanced
Be willing to do what you hands find to do

As for me.....I need to run I have a washing machine looking for me!

Just to let you know....

Our church is on a technology fast this week.... so I will not be blogging until Sunday- Not that I don't love you all :) Just spending time away from technology!

Love you all-

CMN

Deja What?

-Have you ever looked at your kids doing something and had a moment of deja vu?
-Have you ever smelled something from your past and instantly been to that place you remembered from 10 years before?
-Have you ever seen something that takes you down memory lane?

I sure have.....here are some of my Deja Vu's from this week:

1. Heat Rash
Today Emma came home and had hat rash on her legs. I instantly was hurled back in time to the second grade. Did I mention I was raised in St Croix USVI? One day I had heat rash so bad I felt like my legs would combust if I took another step. I could barely walk up the hill to our house. My 9 year old brother convinced me that rubbing alcohol would clean it and make it feel better. Don't try this at home. I still get tears in my eyes remembering that one.

2. Neutrogena Cream
In Target this week (shocker I know - Cylinda and Target in the same sentence) Seanna opened up a jar of Neutrogena cream. I instantly flashed back to Camp Galilee in MN- where I used it nightly just to feel like I would get a date. The hot dates were when a guy would ask you if he could walk with you from the tabernacle (after the dismiss light came on) and took you to the concession stand. I don't recall ever securing that date but I sure felt grown up using it by all of the other teenagers. I miss those chili boats and jolly rancher green apple sticks. My teeth do not.

3. A Milk Truck
This week a milk truck drove by me in traffic. A milk truck you say? Yep. I lived on a dairy farm in WI while my parents traveled on deputation. I helped milk the cows and did the whole farm thing. All of the milk went to the bulk tank, and then twice weekly the milk truck would come and get the milk. There is nothing better than stolen cold milk out of that tank. It was secretly poured into tiny cups by my grandmother. I can also still smell the powdered milk that we used to fill all of the bottle for the little calves. And yes I have a scar from a cow bite. Don't ask.

4. Tamarinds
Yes, I said tamarinds. This week I was homesick for the islands and wanted some tamarinds. I went to Harris Teeter and bought one. Yes- they are expensive. I peeled off the pliable shell and was instantly carried back to the summer of (never you mind) when I was 8 years old. I used to climb the tamarind tree daily and eat until I was filled to the brim. One day - while reaching for a tamarind higher up on a branch I had my mouth open while reaching. This technique helps you concentrate I think. No I was not a mouth breather - I guess I was just reaching too far. Just as I did this a big bumble bee flew right into my mouth....and you guessed it- bit me inside of my mouth. I dropped the tamarind- ran up the hill to tell my Mom. It was on a Thursday night. I did not go to church- the only thing I can tell you is that I resembled the Elephant Girl. I was not dating anyone at the time- hot dates for 8 years olds were pretty scarce.

5. Perfume
Last night while I was trying to do Emma, Seanna, and my hair- someone got into the perfume. I know you won't be able to guess who but her name starts with an E and end's with and A. It rhymes with Bremma. She proceeded to spray my Curve perfume, my DKNY perfume, and John's colonge all on the same arm. She then proceeded to rub it on her face so that her face would smell great for Kids Church.

Perfumes that bring back memories are:
Liz Claiborne
Eternity
Clinique Happy
Caylx by Prescriptive

Isn't it amazing how you can smell perfumes from the past and instantly be right back to that year?

6. Michael Jackson
Okay. Yes I went there. I have never been a Michael Jackson fan. Today I saw a news report that he is making a comeback tour in London. Even though I don't appreciate him, or his music- I can still tell you exactly where I was the first time I heard the song Thriller. I can' also remember his original skin color and a wider nose. But that is all water under the bridge so to speak isn't it?

7. Scratch and Sniff
Who didn't love scratch and sniff products? Again with the Target reference- Seanna and I were smelling perfumes and they had scratch and sniff spots on the outsides of the boxes. I was telling her that I had the best scratch and sniff t-shirt when I was here age. The t-shirt was white with a huge round pizza. The pizza was scratch and sniff. Now that I think about it- it is probably kind of gross. But I wore that t-shirt out. I used to wear that- a jean skirt and my purple pro-ked sneakers. Um did I mention I was a tom boy?

Okay it is now 10:00 PM and my carriage will turn into a pumpkin and my computer is getting ready to walk itself to it's bed. SO I must bid you adieu!

SO what brings about a Deja Vu with you?

Thank you seems like 8 little letters

To all of my bloggy buddies....The way I feel about you can be summarized in this great little story...

A man came out of a store and saw a young boy hanging around his new car. Suspicious of the boy he asked, "What are you doing?" "Studying this car," the boy replied. "Yeah, sure," the man thought. So he began to quiz the boy. "What kind of car is it?" he asked. "A 1999 Mercedes Benz." "What color?" "Metallic burgundy."

After a few more questions, the man realized the little guy knew what he was talking about, and they began to chat. The boy asked how much he paid for the car. The man replied, "Nothing. I had a need and my brother gave it to me."

"I wish..." the boy started.

"...that you had a brother like that?" the man inter­rupted.

"No," said the boy. "I wish I could be a brother like that."

Many of you have gone the extra mile in my life and been that "brother" to me!

Happy Wednesday.....and Thank you!

8 Random Conversations over the past week or two...

So Wow....I am a bad bloggy buddy the past couple of weeks. I have been a little scattered in thoughts, busy out the wazoo (no that is not a word) and not stopping to blog.

Here are some random conversations I have had this past two weeks.

1. Location: Continental Airlines flight from Charlotte to Little Rock- via Houston.
Time: 7:00 Am
Seat: 15C
Passenger in seat 15 D is already drunk and I again remind you it is 7:00 AM.
Passenger to me: So do you want to talk?
Me: Nope- it's too early.
Passenger: Really? Cause I could buy you a drink.
Me: One- I am married- Two- I don't drink- Three you are already drunk
Passenger: I thought you had to buy water on planes now.
Me: Not on Continental you don't- that's why they are so full (sarcasm was lost on him)
Passenger: Is that really why? (believing me in his drunken stupor)
We take off- Passenger falls asleep, snoring loudly, mouth open, and bopping head
in my direction.
Me: Get up....walk up to flight attendant- Is there ANY other seat on this plane
that I can sit at? He is drunk, open mouth snoring and annoying.
Flight Attendant: Nope, please sit down we are heading to turbulence
Me: Great
Summary: Did he snore and bob his head the whole way? Yes...other than when his
friend paid the flight attendant to pour him a Rum and coke.
-Did I mention I did not like that flight attendant? Who continues to serve a
drunk man at 7:30 in the morning?

2. Conversation Location: Nickel's Home- my bedroom
Time of Day: Around 7:00 PM
Emma: Mom I was looking at some old pictures and you used to be really pretty Mom.
Me: Really?
Emma: Yep- you even looked skinny, had white shiny teeth, and a flat stomach.
Me: Is that so?
Emma: Do you think we should tell Dad that you used to look good?
Me: Let's just make that our little secret.



3. Conversation Location: Nickel's Kitchen
Emma: Mom When is your anniversary?
Me: Saturday.
Emma: What are you going to do?
Me: Go to a funeral.
Emma: Were you always this boring Mom- no offense or anything.

4. Conversation Location: Abundant Life Center Church
Circumstance surrounding conversation: We just ran 30 kids over from Kidzone to
church during thunderstorm- as in barrels of water from heaven.
Me to Penny C.: Um Penny my skirt is half off ( I was running to bathroom)
Penny: Laughing- Really?
I run to the bathroom as I try to pull it up. A little girl had pulled it off
while I was delivering her to her Mother.
Sight that was seen: Cylinda's bottom to back 1/2 of the church.
Feeling at that moment knowing I still had to praise sing: Not so priceless

5. Conversation Location: Harris Teeter Grocery Store
Section: Frozen Foods
Seanna: Mom we want Aplabet Tator Tots
Me: We don't eat Tator Tots.
Woman walking by to child (I kid you not) She is one of those.
Emma: If you buy those it will help me to learn how to read and I will pass 2nd
grade:
Me: Done

6. Conversation Location: Laundry Room
Date: Sunday Evening
Emma: Mom can I have a frozen dinner?
Me: No I am making dinner
Emma: Mom really don't feel like you need to it's raining outside and they taste
better than your food anyway.
Me: Wow- thanks
Emma: (gives me hugs) and says how about a kiss for Emma?
Me: Why don't you go kiss your frozen dinner box

7. Conversation Location: My home office
Date: Today
Emma: so I am writing this great story about a girl that gets bought at the
Kids for sale center.
Me: The orphanage?
Emma: yeah- how much should I say their price is for each kid?
Me: are they sassy or nice?
Emma: Mom- come on
Me: I think the price should be negotiable
Emma: I don't know how to spell that

8. Conversation Location: Food Lion
Section of Grocery Store: Produce
Worker at Food Lion: Ned
Me: Excuse me sir- do you have any more bananas in the back of the store you are
out of them.
Ned: No ma'am there is a major snow storm coming tonight- you can't expect
us to have bananas for everyone.
Me: Good to know!

I am sure there are others that will come to mind- but you know since this is my brain cleansing area- now I will have plenty of room to add other conversations to this blog later.

No children were harmed in the creating of this blog although the thought did cross my mind a time or two. Happy Monday.