Sharpies and Goat Skin

So Since I have been writing and writing and writing lately ...

I began to wonder....

Did David use a sharpie and goat skin when he was tending sheep? He couldn't have used a sheep skin- too close to home- and he would have been hated by the flock....

Did he sometimes take his sharpie to the cave and write on the wall and draw pictures? Did he doodle little spears with a stick figure that looked like Saul? And then later send his men with a larger sharpie to scribble it out?

Did he send men back to retrieve the goad skins later to have them written in beetle juice and papyrus and then they were turned into the Psalms?

Would David hang out at Starbucks in today's world with all of the other people that live there with their laptops? I think he would have been a full on caffeine sort of guy.

Would David read blogs? I wonder if he would ever link to mine?

Basically all of this really doesn't matter a hill of beans. What matters is that David was a friend of God.

Do you know why THAT was cool? Because he was one of the most open, transparent, questioning, frustrated people out there- and yet he was a friend of God.

He made mistakes- and he was a friend of God.

Some days the fruit of the spirit had withered off of him like it does me- but yet he was a friend of God.

He knew what is was like to be called, chosen, and yet living in transition- he was a friend of God.

Some days I think he took his goatskin and his Sharpie and wrote- King David over and over and over- even though he was sitting in a cave- fighting for his own very life.

He clung to his calling, his dreams, and his anointing even in the midst of his trial- and he was a friend of God.

So when I get to heaven I want to meet King David. I want to give him a new sharpie and a journal. Who knows I might even give him a leather bound one- and since the herd won't be around shhhh it might even be made out of sheep skin!

Transition and Destination

Transition and Destination…

I read these two words the other day in a magazine called Among Worlds. Those are two words that bring about excitement, dread, anticipation, and a myriad of other emotions and responses to my brain

When thinking about a destination whether it be a vacation, a new job, entering into college, moving to another country– it usually involves a change in our views and ways of coping in our lives. This is something that as an MK we should be used to. Being ready to arrive at our destination with our hearts ready for this transition is not what we are good at.

I can remember a time when I was traveling from St. Croix to Nassau, Bahamas on the Associates in Missions program. I had arrived at the airport to be picked up by someone that I had never met before. I did not know where we were even to meet outside of the airport. I was detained in customs for 2 hours as the customs officials would not release me as I did not know the exact address of the AIM apartment that I was to be living in.

I recalled the horror as the customs officials dumped my suitcase and trunk upside down– I guess hoping that this would jog my memory. I told them the name of the pastor that I was to be helping there, the address of the church and assured them that if they would just let me out of the room he would be waiting for me somewhere outside. I said can you just step outside with me? They asked what does he look like? I said I don’t know. But he will be looking for me. After much persuasion the situation was resolved. But I was already hating my destination even before stepping foot outside of the airport. Why? I was not ready to embrace the transition.

I have since then made many major moves. I have been on AIM in several countries, been to three different colleges, started many jobs and have traveled to many locations. Have I learned anything in those moves? Yes, I have learned that change is hard. I am afraid of change, rejection, new situations, learning new things, being invisible to new people, of loneliness, of people not knowing my stories or history, fearful of having to validate myself all over again.

I have finally come to this conclusion. I don’t have to validate myself– HE does it for me. I have learned that when I pack, load, unload, unpack I am strong, and that I have the ability to relocate, to have strong skills that allow me to adapt to new situations. Do you know why? Because I have had to do it over and over again. I have a history. The consistent thing in my history of change has been that HE has been my constant. My constant friend, motivator, hug giver, rewarder, and listener.

I have learned that I have experiences that others around me need to hear. I have had to let new people in my life so that they can hear those stories. How can I tell them if I am so afraid of change that I don’t let others in?

So today even though I am forty years old and have lived in the same city for 10 1/2 years (yes this is a record for me) I am facing another time of change in my life. Another chapter is going to begin. Suitcases will eventually get packed, goodbyes will be said, and addresses exchanged. Because of my history of transitions and destination I know that we will be fine. I know how to move– I am good at that. It is the transition that is the tricky part.

Today if you are an MK in the middle of a transition in your life– know this. You are not alone, you are not invisible, your stories do matter, you have not changed– your address has. He has placed you right where you are today to impact others around you. Don’t let your destination paralyze you in this time of transition. There is only one you– let your multifaceted personality shine for HIM today. Embrace your destination!

The Disobedience, The Note, The Rock

Yesterday was quite the day with Emma. She would not focus while doing her homework. What should have been a 45 minute session took 2 hours. She was staring at the light, bringing her dolls over to teach during her reading time, and just giving up on it all in other parts. I kept reminding her that the longer she took to concentrate - the longer it would be before she was done with her homework.

When she was finally done I asked her to upstairs and get her bath and wash her hair so that she would be ready for church. I asked her to do this four times. She finally went upstairs. I then did not hear the water turning on- but heard her putting in a DVD. I went up to the play room and sure enough- she about jumped out of her skin when I came in. I told her to turn her DVD off and to go to her room. She knew that she was in deep trouble. Now I cannot remember the last time that she has gotten a spanking. She was probably 6. We do not use a belt, or a wooden spoon, before you all email me about the horrible way I parent. She started crying before I got into the room.

Later that night when I was getting ready for bed- I found a note and a rock under my pillow. The note said- Dear Mom, I am sory I was being bad then she dew a sad face. Her rock was her most treasured one that she had. Her note was written in purple pen.

I started crying when I read the note. Not that the note had touched me to my inner core- because it had- but even more so because it reminded me of my own life.

How many times- even as of late have I been disobedient to the voice of God in my life? The voice that told me to let situations go, to trust in him, to not worry, to put people in HIS hands, to try to stop fixing HIS stuff, to rest in him, to love even when I was shattered by others.

As I put the note on the dresser- I quickly asked the Lord to forgive me. I asked him to bathe me in his acceptance, in his love, and in his grace. To let me be reassured again that HE loved me. That even when I was not being fully obedient to him I drastically needed to find his arms of strength again. That he would draw me in, ruffle my hair, kiss my cheek and tell me I was his and his alone and he was taking care of me and all of my situations.

I cherish that note from Emma. Not because of the moment of her disobedience, but because of the moment of our reconciliation. I think in the same way HE cherishes me all the more when I run back to him, asking for forgiveness, and looking to him for his love and acceptance.

I get so frustrated with myself. My lack of foresight, my lack of change in some areas, my over-caring of what people think of me, my people pleasing ways, my weariness in areas. But then I get a grip and look to him.

Do you know what? He really believes in me! He thinks the best of me. He knows that I have a great and bright future, and that I am going to rock this world for him. That is how he sees me. He sees what I am becoming. He knows that the plans, the visions, the dreams that he has given me are going to come to pass. So even on the days that I am scribbling notes of forgiveness to him and trying to find a pretty rock - he already sees what I am to become!

Are you going through a time of questioning, a time of needing to grab a rock and a note? Are you frantically trying to find your purple pen to scribble your thoughts to him? He is right there waiting for you! He loves you. His forgiveness awaits you today.

Emma-ism for today

Emma is sitting here and I kept hearing a spitting noise over and over. I was like what are you doing?
Seanna: She is spitting on Eric and Emily’s hair (her American Girl Doll twins) to make their hair move where she wants it too…..
Why do I get the gross kid? I am trying not to vomit
Emma: Mom I am just trying to make their hair look good- Can I use your camera to take their picture?

She had picture day today and came home with a huge strand on the side of her hair pulled out of her pony tail
Cylinda: Please tell me why you did that?
Emma: All of the fashion girls do that
Cylinda: Did you have it like that for your picture?
Emma: I don't remember Mom- it was a long time ago
It was about two hours before. I dread seeing her second grade pictures!

17 minutes and counting

So I HATE HOMEWORK....really I know that I don't do homework- but I might as well be doing it with the girls. They leave the house at 6:45 am and get home at 2:23 PM daily- yes I know this.

Then for TWO HOURS they do homework - and that is average.

Yesterday - Emma had a her friend Taliah over. Taliah is Emma's best friend. Taliah and her family are moving to Boston (yes the tears are flowing). So after yesterday's play date it looks like our living room has been taken over by pet shop toys. No really it has. I walked to the office this morning and about cussed in 17 languages- what was I stepping on? Some overly large-headed duck with a tiny body. I about threw it out the window.

SO I told Emma last night after church that since she had such a hard day- I would let her clean up today after she was done with her homework. That is because I am such a reasonable mother (I tell myself).

It has now been 17 minutes. She has picked up animals, she has lined them up by color, she has sang to them, she has put them in a little bus, she has played "London Bridges" with them, she has taken them on a "camping trip", she has gone to the hospital to check on the new babies that have been born, and STILL HAS NOT CLEANED UP!! I am TRYING NOT TO LOOSE IT...really I am trying but failing.

She is not playing radio disney for them in her barbie car and they are at a concert. NONE of this involves cleaning up.

I just said to her- EMMA YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE CLEANING UP. She told me Mom I am having a hard day. My best friend in the world is moving this week to Boston and I feel like Grammie just died all over again- I need more time to clean up.

Enough said. I said you have five minutes and I don't want to see another pet shop on the floor or they will all be in the trash.



Amazing.

Suddenly someone is in action.

I should have thought of that 18 minutes ago......

I want more!

So I sit in my house and I type. Why do I type? Because I am behind on many e-devotionals for the MKs. That is you- or maybe not you if you are reading this in blog world.

I sat and reflected on a conversation that I had with my former manager at Cassis Travel Services. While she was living in New York- a studio apartment was 1800.00 monthly. That was for two rooms. Your every belonging was within two rooms. She ended up moving to LA where things were still pricy but you had more room. She wanted more for her life. So spread her wings. She took a risk, she left her job- but she discovered more.

I can recall a time when I was about 10 years old in St. Croix. My Mom had taco night once a week. It was our highlight. Even though the ground beef came from grass fed cows- and was strong. We loved it. The catch- my Mom would only cook a pound of hamburger for all four of us to eat. This sounds like a lot- but divide that out by 12 tacos and it came to about two tablespoons per taco. My brother who was 14 and a math whiz had all of this figured out. He was the self-appointed guardian of the taco meat. One night I did not care about his rules- I wanted more meat. He of course caught me on my third spoonful and reported me to the proper authorities- my parents. How could I break the rules? Why couldn’t I just be happy with my two spoonfuls? He just couldn’t understand.

Have you ever been to a point where you are ready for more? You are done with the regular and are moving on? The Lord knew that we would feel this way- in John 10:10 he says “I have come that they might have life, and have it to the full” That is what we crave- and that is what we were made for. To want more.

Wouldn’t it be great to be free from habits that tie us down? To be placed in a ministry of serving others that you find the fulfillment that you are searching for? Wouldn’t it be great to live each day in spiritual confidence instead of doubt and fear?

Here are some of the things he wants to give us: Joy, peace, fulfillment, courage, a positive witness for him, an overcoming spirit. Think of the children of Israel. Their “more” was a land of milk and honey. It was waiting for them. At times- they could not see it because they were in the journey- but their final destination was to that “more”.

I read today of a man who was an advertising executive in St. Louis Mo. He was led to the Lord at a later age. He read the book “God’s Smugger” which was written by a christian who was working for God behind the iron curtain. He was so touched he could not stop reading the book. He then told the Lord- d if you want to use me in this capacity I will be happy to do whatever I can for you. He had that MORE spirit inside of him. Today Pat Bradley, is the founder of International Crisis Aid. He has a ministry to Ethiopia, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Southern Sudan, North Korea, Indonesia, and Cambodia. At the age of fifty three his life is just getting started all because of a God given desire for more.

What is God dealing with you about? What has he planted in your heart? What dreams and desires do you have that you have not seen come to pass yet? Did you know that the work that he has started in you will come to pass? Why? Because you desire More of Him and he always meets us at our level of expectation!

Fever

And I don't mean the song.

I have had a fever -well I key word HAD.

I have not been sick much this year at all- HALLELUJAH. In fact the last time I was to the Dr was in January when I wanted a referral to go to the dermatologist to get more lovely skin cancer removed.

So last Tuesday I got the fever, aches, chills, etc and it hit me with a bam. Tylenol and friends did not help by Friday I relented and went to the Dr. He said I had a sinus infection and bronchitus. So he gave me a z-pack. By Sunday- I was still with a fever and upset about it. I cried asking the Lord to take it away as I can't function with it and Colleen Carter- missionary to Ghana was on her way the next day-

That night the Lord had a Pastor in another state to call me while driving with his wife. He prayed over me and I kid you not- while he was praying for me the fever broke and I started sweating and rejoicing immediatly.

Thank the LORD- he is so good and merciful. I'll tell you what. It gives you a whole new compassion for those who are sick for a legnth of time at home- or have terminal illnesses.

Okay enough of my serious chat for today-

I have so much to blog about from August on- that is a month and 1/2 worth of stuff.

Will I ever get caught up?

Will my blogs ever be regular?

Does this sound like an old time radio program?

Tune in to see!

Love you bloggie buddies!!

CMN

Wow- Lincoln thinks you are so cool they named their new car after you

So Lincoln has a new car - MKs-
It is the classiest of all of their makes
Leather Seats- hand stitched
Special Rims
Only the best of the best can have it

Similar to an MK
Priceless

That's what I am talking about

MK Retreat 2008- Relentless

Thank you all for your prayers and your financial support for a great MK Retreat. It was August 15th-18th, 2008. We had over 93 mks from all over the world there. Some flew in from their countries to attend and others flew in and drove in from all over the US.

The Lord really ministred. All of the sessions were taught by MKs to MKs. Philip Vannoy, Bruce Howell, and Mark Hattabaugh helped with the evangelistic services. The Lord moved, lives were touched- it was amazing.

Don't think it was all serious- we had an obstibcle course, broom hockey, No Guts No Glory competition, and the 1st annual MK's got talent competition!!

Mks know who they are!! They are HIS!!!