Tuesday, May 01, 2012

I think I have a tumor- no wait- it's just a hole in my spanx.

Have you ever had a hole in your "Spanx" and suddenly thought you had a tumor? You instantly think- who is my husband going to marry when I die? Who will tell the girls that they can't marry someone unless they are a true worshiper? Who will tell them they can't leave the house until their entire outfit is ironed? You have your pastor and prayer warrior friends on speed dial and look down and realize. Oh - hold on - that is just a rip in my "Spanx".  I am okay.

Then you have a second situation on hand- you soon realize you can't get that fat skin back under the "Spanx" either. That is like trying to open a tube of biscuits and deciding you don't want them for dinner. Too late. Not going to be getting all of the dough back in that tube any time soon sista. It would be easier to shove your days worth of toothpaste back in and not smile all day.  

All of this is equal to taking back words that were too quickly spoken. We all need to make a pack that when our filter is off - we just don't speak to each other.

Can you imagine going to church on a day when you don't have a conversation filter? How are you today Cylinda? In your head you want to say I was doing a lot better until you and your 7 coffee breathed, germ rubbing children started climbing on me. But since you agreed not to talk without your filter on- you just smile and say "Good Morning- doing great- basking in the presence of the Lord today."

Today is one of those days where I am tired and I know that my filter is not 100% so I am sitting at home knitting prayer shawls and praying for hours on end. Who am I kidding?I don't know the first thing about knitting. I am taking less calls and trying to read the word more. I am trying to guard my heart, tongue, and mind with all diligence.  I do pray that my "Spanx" will stay together until the day is done.

This blog was not paid for by "Spanx" or it's sister companies. By the way why do we have to be all dignified now and say "Spanx"? Grandma Eikamp just called it a girdle! 

"Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies." (Psalm 34:13)


Kathy McElhaney said...

Love this post! Literally laughing out loud. The pictures you have painted are SO vivid! I have days when my mouth needs more than Spanx!

True family story - back when I couldn't say my Rs, I scooted up next to my Dad on the couch and said, "My gudle is killing me."

Paula said...

What a great way to start my day. :) Great blog. Great insight. Gotta keep that filter on! (Some days I think I need to super glue it on or something!)

Maybe we can take knitting classes together sometime? Might come in handy in our old age...hehe.

Love ya!

Melissa Hineman said...

Oh Cylinda, miss your humor and spot-on insight being so close to home! I'm keeping my verbal Spanx on today for sure:-)

Anonymous said...

Love it!
-Jane Girl